'He didn't speak to me the whole shuttle ride': 5'1" Woman is berated by family for not giving her first-class upgrade to her 6'6" brother

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  • 01
    "All 5 of my siblings and my parents are upset with me"
  • 02
    r/AmltheAsshole u/Abbyissostupid • 3d AITA for not letting my 6'6" brother have the free first class upgrade the airline gave me on our 12 hour flight?
  • 03
    Hello AITA-- We are at the beginning of my dad's retirement family trip. He is paying for all of us to meet as a family in Hawaii for a week since he is retiring after working at the same company for 42 years. There are six of us but my brother and I live in the same part of the country.
  • 04
    I guess it's relevant to say I am 5'1" and my brother is 6'6". I fly all the time for work and have quite a bit of status with the airline for which my dad bought our tickets. This is what happened way earlier today. We were all boarded and ready to go when a flight attendant came up to me and whispered that they had a first class passenger not show up and they needed the coach seat to accommodate a standby passenger. She said I had by far the most status of anyone on the plane so they were will
  • 05
    When we landed and were waiting for our shuttle my brother was so pissy but wouldn't tell me what was going on. He didn't speak to me the whole shuttle ride. We had a nice hello with the rest of the family but after I got down from my shower my mom took me aside and said what I did "was awful." I asked her what she was talking about and she said that I should have given my brother the seat. I thought that would be the end of it but all 5 of my siblings and my parents are upset with me and the va
  • 06
    I was trying to play with my niece and nephew in the lobby waiting for lunch and my sister said "no they only like to play with people who give a about their family--what were you thinking?" I asked her if this was about the first class thing and she said "what do you think its about?" I said that he never asked me to switch with him, she said "an makes people beg, family members don't." I've been by myself since brunch and not having much fun. AITA?
  • 07
    BetAlternative8397 • 3d Partassipant [2] Had something happen to me years ago on Air Canada. Vancouver to Toronto red eye. Flying with adult daughter and got tagged for upgrade. I asked about letting her fly up front instead and was told the seat is only available to the status holder. I was exhausted from a week working away so I took it. No one shamed me for it. NTA. Your brother was getting a free vacation and being jealous of your . And ill informed. status was Too many people think the life
  • 08
    Dear_Condition_1339.3d So they do go down the list. I knew that United had a list bc I saw my name on the list as the next one to get upgraded once.
  • 09
    HustlinInTheHall • 3d United literally puts the list on a screen so you know how many places down the list you are. They put the list in the app. Most airlines would not let you transfer the ticket to another non- status member anyway.
  • 10
    Nekawaii19. 3d Yeah, OP! Tell them that it wasn't even an option for him to move to first class, if you had declined, they would have moved the next person on the list, not your brother.
  • 11
    Dear_Condition_1339. 3d NTA You earned the points. Also how old is everyone? Everyone I know who is over 6ft usually ask if they can pick their seat or ask if they can pay the person buying the seat the extra amount to get the leg room. Edit- most airlines have a list of members and their statuses. They go down the list and offer it so I don't think they would just give it to your brother. They might make him pay for it or more likely just keep going down the list. Anyone a flight attendant here
  • 12
    Aylauria • 3d Professor Emeritass [91] Edit- most airlines have a list of members and their statuses. They go down the list and offer it so I don't think they would just give it to your brother. They might make him pay for it or more likely just keep going down the list. Anyone a flight attendant here? What y'all usually do? Exactly. There is zero guarantee that he would have qualified. And they wouldn't necessarily have allowed her to swap seats either. Her options were to take the upgrade she
  • 13
    Fearless_Ad1685 • 3d Colo-rectal Surgeon [34] NTA but you sure have a family of them. Your status got you the offer. If you declined it, it wouldn't have gone to your brother anyway. No reason you should have turned it down just to stay in coach with your brother. Try to explain it to your family but none of this makes you an
  • 14
    Simple-Status-15. 3d , I'd be flying home. To treat you like that with them if they Edit...forgot she's in Hawaii. Enjoy your trip, go sightseeing, shopping, laying on the beach
  • 15
    WinginVegas • 3d Partassipant [1] NTA. As someone with lifetime status on two airlines, had you asked for your brother to take the seat, they would have given it to the next highest status person on the flight since they want to reward their frequent flyers, not relatives. Tell your family they don't understand how this works and that this wasn't just that you had an "extra" first class upgrade coupon, it was an on the moment upgrade just for you based on status.
  • 16
    No_Cheetah4762 • 3d NTA. I'm a foot taller and 150 pounds heavier than my wife, who has MVP Gold status due to work travel. When we're flying together and there's only one upgrade, she gets it because she's the one that has to deal with airlines and airports 20 times a year. I've never once considered asking her to give it to me. It's her perk. Your family is weird for taking offense as a group over a seat on a plane.
  • 17
    HustlinInTheHall • 3d Yeah this sounds more like golden child syndrome. Guarantee the shoe on the other foot and everyone would tell OP to just get over it.
  • 18
    Canadian JediCouncil. 3d Your brother is a passive-aggressive whiner who apparently can't even USE HIS WORDS and runs to his mommy to fight his disputes for him. You totally deserved that upgrade, and even more so in retrospect because of how your brother acted like a toddler who missed his nap. You (and your niece and nephew) are the only non- A's in this story.
  • 19
    StrangerOnReddit ⚫ 3d Commander in Cheeks [233] NTA. You earned your status by flying so frequently for work. Your brother did not, he's not entitled to YOUR upgrade YOU earned. I'd also argue that if you're flying that frequently, you deserve first class every once and awhile. I honestly think it's your whole family has sided with your brother. If they are SO concerned with his comfort they could have all chipped in to ensure he got a seat with more leg room in first class.

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